Saturday 6 August 2022

PHPM Posting and The Value of Not Giving Up

 


Hi assalamualaikum, 

It’s been awhile. 

Currently I am in my last posting, Population Health Preventive Medicine (PHPM). Scary? I can’t deny. I thought PHPM is gonna be the lek lek posting but to my surprise, it is not. NOT AT ALL. Plus, I am one of the small group leaders and also I become the leader for program bureau, so what do I expect. I wanted to revise for my finals, but to my surprise again I am busy handling all these things and to my another surprise, I love it. I love to make myself busy with program, sleep at 3am, engaging with people. Sometimes, I do feel tired because I need to give instructions and wonder whether it’s best for others or not, yeah plus I have a meeting tomorrow. 

I visited to most of the areas in Seksyen 7 Shah Alam because there is where we need to do “community profiling”. Basically, we will go to this area, interview the representatives of that area to search any unresolved or ignored health issues, then we will make awareness regarding that issue by doing a health promotion. Wow I just summarised “community profiling”. 


I visited the B40, M40 and T20 living areas. Throughout my visitation, other than feeling amazed by the magnificent view of Shah Alam, I feel grateful. I feel grateful that actually Allah has blessed me with so many things. Allah has blessed me with a very comfortable complete house, a loving family, and friends, health, intelligence, talent and so many things. The reason why I think so is that, not so many people are that fortunate like me. Probably, I have what they don’t have and they have what I don’t have. I believe that Allah will give us something that we need and not what we want. It’s true “nikmat Allah manakah lagi yang ingin kamu dustakan”.

Because I am the group leader I also learnt about the value of not giving up. The first day of the interview, our group is the only group who didn’t manage to interview anyone. As the leader, I felt so disappointed with myself. I still remember how lethargic I was going into the class feeling like a failure. But I don’t know there’s a voice inside my head whispering that “kau bukan pengalah, doh, Sabrina, you will fight this, no matter how tiring it is”. Yeah, I fought, even though I admit that some of them asked me to stop fighting. As a result, alhamdulillah, with the help of Allah, my big boss leader, and my teammate and my housemates we did it! We managed to interview 3 important people in the Klinik Kesihatan, and that was a very huge achievement for my group as a whole. I feel grateful. Indeed, I could not do it with the help of Allah. 

Went back from Shah Alam at almost 10pm. Missing Aqil in this picture

After a tiring walk through survey

All in all, this week is so tiring. But, I am satisfied, at the same time I still feel that I am not good enough of being a leader. But I believe there’s always room for improvement. Next week is gonna be another new challenge for me. A lot of things lingers on my mind : PHPM thing, my personal issue, Medical quiz competition that I wanna participate and finals (NOOOO). 

Please pray for me. 

Sabrina Shekh. 

Sunday 21 November 2021

Random Thoughts about Life

 Hi assalamualaikum everyone, 

I am feeling demotivated lately. Probably I dwelled myself too much into my assignments, then I don’t get adequate sleep -> I wake up late -> I sleep in the morning hahahah. 

This entry is gonna be a brief one. Because I am feeling blue right now, I am gonna share with you guys a few things that I learnt randomly about life. Basically most of the ideas come from the books I have read. 

1) If you want to become the happiest person, GIVE! 

Example: what I’m doing right now. I feel rejuvenated while typing this entry :D 


2) If you want to change yourself, ACT! 

Example: if you say that you are not good at being a leader, FOR ME, affirmations like “I am a great leader” won’t help that much. Instead, when i fail being one, I will feel that I’m lying to myself. 

Now, what I did was I do / act / behave like one. What does a good leader do? So yeah, a list of things will pop up in my mind. Then, by putting those ‘things’ into action then I believe that I am a good leader. 


3) You don’t believe in yourself? Fake it until you make it! 

Example: I am struggling in having a conversation with people. Yeah, in fact, I’m still, until now. However, what I learnt was that thoughts that I’m having on my mind such as “you are awkward with people” which was basically formed because of my past / trauma, just exist inside my mind. So, yeah just act like you are the heroine of your own movieee. A five star one! 


4)  You feel sad? Accept it! Be brutally honest to yourself why

Example: I hate one of my friends. For me, she is too opinionated, bossy, too knowledgeable and overrated (HAMEK KAU HAHAHAH).  Her presence just irritate me so much. I will avoid meeting her AT ALL COST. Right now, I wrote down her name, and why I don’t like her so much on my diary. Surprisingly, it helps me a lot!! Not just her, i also wrote down a few other peoples name that I don’t think we vibe (HAHAHAHHA PEBENDA LAH KAU BUAT NI SENAH). It was such a relief after that!! I can confront her and those people. By writing down all those things, made me accept who they are. 

Another example is most of the time, I’m afraid of voicing out my opinion. In the class especially. I used to repeat the affirmation like “you are brave” and all that. Instead of feeling better, I feel so much worse because I know that’s not the truth. But, right now when I encounter the situation again, I just admit that I’m afraid of voicing out my opinion, then after that I open my microphone immediately and say exactly what’s on my mind. Amazing isn’t it?

Okeh that’s all from me! 

Bye!